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Its so hard

Still not sure when I get to have my next orgasm.

I am trying very hard to be good, but last night, I may have watched a bit too much pron last night for my own good.

My driver had her own personal business to attend to last weekend but promises me she will "utterly wreck" me later.   She did do a cam show Saturday night, and the moment I tuned in, she made me go put my cage on.  Its seems like she will not let me watch her without wearing it.  Sometimes, she will have me estim through the cage using the sounds from the cam room. Its pure torture not being aloud to have a full erection or orgasm while watching her.  I guess that is the point. 

Tonight, I will be playing with the 2B, but not in a good way.  I need to find some settings S can use a punishment settings.   The Estim Bondage program has really opened my eyes to the possibility of including some "torture" settings to be used in short bursts.  During a bondage session, knowing these settings can be used will really increase the adrenaline level.  The key is the trust I have with my driver not to over do it.  I have had some really sadists at the helm who want to do nothing but cause pain.  That is not what I am looking for.

Last week, S had me do a 21 minute Estim Bondage session.  My next session will be 22 minutes, and so on.  All the other settings were left at the default levels.  However, I think it would be a good idea to let S dictate some of the settings.

The Estim Bondage program allows you to set the Minimum and Maximum levels of both the Tease signals, and the Torture signals.

By default, the Tease range from 25% to 40%,  They are calibrated at 30%; this means that you had set the 2B to give you a tease signal at the highest you could handle at the 30% level.  So, when they play at 40%, it is higher then you calibrated at. 

I think I will ask S to pick what minimum tease range she wants me to use during these self-bondage sessions.  At 25%, it is a weak signal.  She could decide to increase it slightly with each session.  The impact is to increase the average loudness of tease signals and make it harder for me to avoid orgasm.

25%, then 26%, then 27%....
If she was in a particularly cruel mode, she could even raise the maximum a bit.  41%, 42%.....


The Torture signals also have a minimum and Maximum setting.  By default, they are 70% and 100%.

70% is a hard signal to endure, but nothing compared to the 100%. 
If she were "in a mood", she could tell me to set the minimum to 100% and each torture signal would be at its highest.

There are other settings that can me manipulated; everything from the probability of torture signals in the loop, to the durations of individual signals.

I do not want to make it too complicated though.  If she wanted to, she could explore the program herself and dictate exactly what settings she wanted me to follow for any particular session.  That is entirely up to her. 

The idea, is that I get to do a self-bondage session, and risk orgasm while bound, AND without permission.  I have to do my best to avoid any orgasm without permission, unless I want to find myself in my cage for a week.

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